I know you cry behind those walls.
They are not as thick as you think.
They are not weak, they are strong,
but they can turn transparent on me.
Can you see what they can see?
Can you see what they can’t see?
They can lie well enough,
but is it worth it to keep them lying?
Will you be able to tell later,
that this is a lie to protect you, or fool you?

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Ted was absolutely right. When we fall in love with someone or when we are in a relationship, we get to know them inside out. We do so much research on them and knowing every little detail is fascinating and important. And that all goes to waste when we break up with them or when they cease to exist in our lives. I know I want to retain your memories forever even though they will bring pain. But knowing you has been the best time of my life and I can’t ever want to forget that. This period is so confusing and endearing and traumatizing and I don’t know if this is how it will be from now on, but I’d like to tell myself this – this too shall pass. But you know what? I don’t want it to pass if this is the closest I’m gonna be of you.

#Mondaymorningrant

I don’t know what else to do when I miss you so much, so some rant here ❤️

Randomness is my thing but when it comes to you, certainties are comforting. The ritual got broken today and I am as misplaced as a crayon between water colors, painting the sky, painting my world. © seekingmypeace

Dreams that wake me

The repercussions
of a disturbed sleep
are the dreams,
the ones you get
when you have woken once.
The thoughts that chase you
then
stay with you
and your dreams become
the alternate realities;
seeing your worst fears come true
and then waking up
with a sweaty forehead,
heart racing fast
is what my masochist heart
craves for ❤️

© seekingmypeace

As a person who is affected by very less things, I can’t do much when my mind and heart plot against me, except sit back and enjoy the horror show every morning.

As I get closer to me,
I get further away from world;
there is a safe place
that keeps calling out to me.
I know I will choose it,
like you did a while back.
The only difference is
you got there because of a heartbreak
and I am getting here by falling in love ❤️

© seekingmypeace

Another day,
another disappoinment.
They hurt less now,
until they start hurting more.
Because how could they not?
My expectations can’t nearly reduce
as rapidly as my love for you increases
each day, with each breath ……………….

Drops

I will disappear into this cloud of nothingness and make sure the winds turn the other way But even then I can’t guarantee you that when there will be showers some days, they would not fall on you, despite my efforts. ©seekingmypeace